The Month of Mellow Fruitfulness By Lesley Smith
September – the month of mellow fruitfulness and soft evenings (usually) is also the month when I unwittingly started training to be Anne Boleyn at the age of four.
My mother (who was local to Lichfield up until being married) liked us five children to look as smart as possible for school, so the nuns wouldn’t talk about her. I was by far the youngest, so really was brought up almost like an only child, giving mother more time to spray starch my school uniform shirt collars and anywhere else that looked like it needed a bit of a stiffen – even if it didn’t. My uniform was positively crispy.
Sore neck, red itchy line (hence the link to Anne Boleyn) almost all the way round but I didn’t complain, as there were other children at school also rubbing their fingers down their collars. I was a year younger than most of the other children, as the nuns agreed to take me a year early. They must have felt sorry for mother as they knew the rest of the children in the brood and my siblings were all reserved and quiet.
I was nothing of the sort, which will not be a surprise to any readers who know me or have seen me perform. The other garment issue I had was a liberty bodice that I had to wear on top of my vest and continued to wear in larger and larger sizes until I was fourteen. They were hand-me-downs from my sisters. This name will be a mystery to readers of this article who are young or even middle-aged.
To explain, it is a lambswool lined waistcoat made of hardwearing thick cotton and had small rubber buttons. It reached down to the waist and came in two colours, cream or a pale peach colour. Some of the versions had suspender belts attached. Some boys as well as girls wore them but presumably without the suspender belt! They were frightful but, as the name suggests, they were intended to provide considerably more freedom and comfort than the Victorian corsets that they replaced.
This garment had gone out of fashion by the end of the 1950s but I still had one in 1971, when the other girls at school (it was an all-girls convent) had 32A-cup bras in pretty colours. Fortunately, I wasn’t teased but my friends just shook their heads in sympathy. Now and again, I raise the subject of liberty bodices to audiences and ask people to put their hands up if they wore one. It’s cold in Buxton is all I can say, and men and women of about a third of the audience put their hands up to uproarious laughter.
One woman still had hers in the back of her airing cupboard, she told me. I bet when she got home, she got it out and looked at it. I did, however, love school, which makes me sound like a creep, but actually I did! All those friends, all that falling over in the school grounds and school dinners. My mother ran a tight ship but cooking was a waste of time to her, so we had forty ways with mince or packet food. Instant TV dinners at the time served in a tinfoil tray were ghastly and worryingly, the thinly sliced beef had a green sheen to it. Iridescent, like oil on water. No wonder I liked school dinners. Now I love to cook – I learned young, it was survival.
Now, as the years have rolled by, the time for the school children starting their first day is upon us. Poor little nervous souls, clinging sweaty-handed to mother or father at the school gates. My eldest sister Trisha was asked politely if she would kindly go home and not cling to the school gates trying to have a glimpse of her child (she had five children too but is a brilliant cook). When my son Henry started at the Cathedral School, he was so delighted with his uniform he would wear it for days leading up to starting school. He had a little yellow peaked cap like a canary.
When he first started school, off he went cheerfully, whilst I and my late husband sat by the phone despite the fact that we lived across the road from the school ourselves. So, this article reminds us of the shared experience of school, and starting school ourselves, and the adventures that lay ahead for us. I do feel however that starched collars for school uniform are rightly a thing of the past and Liberty Bodices definitely are. The schoolchildren of today have much to be grateful for. If you have a liberty bodice in your airing cupboard, do send a picture to the Editor of this fine magazine so other readers can enjoy seeing it!









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